#are you trans if you dont experience dysphoria

[spartalabouche]

sometimes its really obvious how much people dont actually believe presentation=/=gender when they see their nonbinary friend go from extremely masculine to relaxing back into femininity once theyre comfortable with their gender and every time they call it detransitioning with zero indication thats what their friend is calling it. i dont know how to tell you this but sometimes you present a certain way for social reasons and not because thats how you actually feel. sometimes you experience dysphoria about your body that is actually related to how people view you and not how you feel about your body. i really dont think its that uncommon for trans people to swing really hard in one direction for the affirmation and then relax back into a different presentation once they are more comfortable in their gender

[sunny-daze-days]

Being Trans and not experiencing gender dysphoria that strongly has got to be one of the weirdest experiences I've ever felt.

Do I know I'm a man? Yes.

Does not having a you know what downstairs feel like not having on a ring you've had on for years? Yes, I feel like I'm missing something.

Do I wish I had a flat chest above all else? Yes

But it's not debilitating. I'm just there. My body is just existing. is it kind of shitty I don't have a flat chest and a you know what? Yeah, but my brain isn't as concerned about it as other Trans men are and I think that's one of the reasons it's like taken me so long to come out and validate myself as a Trans man.

Like when I was introduced to the concept of being transgender, gender dysphoria was like presented as almost a requirement for being Trans, if that makes sense. Like I thought because I didn't feel gender dysphoria (at least not much, I felt gender euphoria more) that I somehow wasn't Trans enough.

Does anyone else thats Trans (man or otherwise) also feel this way? Genuine question

[kingscythe]

seeing other trans people take your deadname as their chosen one feels so weird. sort of like if you gave away a shirt you hated and some time later you look over the aisle to see someone clutching the thing to their chest, beaming like its the most beautiful piece of clothing in the world. and then you gotta be like damn. stuff really is what we make of it huh

[spyroz]

Being non dysphoric trans at least for me is more of a political statement than a description of literal reality. It says "I'm for bodily autonomy in all circumstances and without explanation" but it does also say "I love my trans body"

Every person in the world would likely become 'dysphoric' if described or gendered or viewed in a way antithetical to their self image, trans or otherwise. So pulling the "erm technically you do have dysphoria" response just isn't necessary. We already know this. It depends on how you define the word "dysphoria", but idgaf about semantics like that, my goal is simply to send a message and describe myself in the *closest possible way* to the truth. But nothing is ever *entirely* true

People posting about how "non dysphoric trans people aren't really non dysphoric" are missing the point because dysphoric or nondysphoric was never a binary in the first place. These are made up words and I'm using the one closest to my experience, doesn't mean it has to fit 10000% of the time. It isn't so black and white, nothing is.

[omgcatboi]

I just learned you can report anons, so guess what just happened to the anon being intentionally transphobic to me? ( they got reported )

I don't ever post about any negativity sent my way because I always just block and go about my day, but this time, I noticed that you can infact report anons now.

So I'm just spreading awareness so all my followers know that you can, infact, possibly get someones account shadowbanned for them sending enough anon hate that gets reported.

I understand being degraded, insulted, and humiliatiled are all kinks I have and thoroughly enjoy but you need to ask someone in dms or anon if it's ok to call them certain things before you do so. I reported the anon because I don't want these behaviors being normalized against other fat trans folk despite me personally not being bothered by these insults.

[find-your-flame]

Beige Mirror

Sonic doesn't make a habit of looking at himself in the mirror for very long.

It's not that he doesn't like looking at himself (quite the opposite, in fact), he just doesn't need the reassurance. He knows he looks great without having to double-check, he knows his quills will sort themselves into their natural, phenomenal style without him having to bother with products or styling, and he knows his adorable, handsome face doesn't need any help from bottles, brushes, or powders. He's cute and he knows it, and he doesn't even have to try!

But every now and then, he ends up catching sight of his reflection and-- well. It's not that he hates what he sees. He looks fine, he always does, it's just...

Well, he looks fine.

Not great, not phenomenal, not... Not anything.

Just... Fine.

His eyes flick about, picking apart the hedgehog in the mirror, and he looks alright. There's nothing wrong with him, there never is.

But...

(He turns his head down and combs his fingers through his quills.)

(His hands run down his sides and his front.)

(He licks his thumb and tries to smooth down the fur on his cheeks.)

(He stares into his own eyes, trying to figure out what's so off today.)

He frowns, huffs softly through his nose, and turns away from the mirror with a loose shrug.

It's just okay.

[zapsoda]

one of these individuals is trans and the other is a terf. can you tell which is which just based on what theyre saying here.

because i couldnt. i didnt realize they were a terf until i looked at their blog.

if you lack compassion and thought for your fellow trans people, particularly those with different experiences, you may end up saying shit like this thinking it is smart and progressive. gender itself ≠ gender roles, societal expectations based on gender, or the very nature of enforcing and forcing those ideas onto others, etc etc etc.

[aoifereal]

Man. It's crazy how much I've changed in the last year and a half. My tits are so much bigger now. I think my haircut is better. I'm bigger overall but I don't feel big in my body (a thing I used to cry about). My hairs no longer bright red. I used to have some slay feminine looks which was cool at the time even if I wouldn't want to dress that way now. I didn't know how to dress myself properly I was buttoning women's shirts all the way up lol. I was pretty in a way I don't really feel these days and I think if I looked the way I looked then now I'd be more confident going in like. Women's toilets for example.

[cepheusgalaxy]

Love it how ass class said "if you try to teach your kids by shouting at them the only thing they'll learn is how to try and predict you so you don't shout at them" and literally everything else they said in there. Gold show.

[party-gilmore]

“you’ve got he/him in your bio but you don’t even try to pass 🙄”

this is because i (a man) love cross-dressing (as a woman) hope that helps

[dashiellqvverty]

i fucking hate the fake progressive transphobia of saying (for example) "ummm well men can wear dresses nowadays, why should i ASSUME someone i perceive as a man in a dress is a trans woman" like okay why are you prioritizing the feelings of a hypothetical cis man over an actual trans woman expressing frustration with being misgendered. and also lets be real its probably going to be a lot less hurtful to this hypothetical man and easier for him to correct you if you gender him as female than if it were the other way around. anyway THIS IS NOT ME SAYING PRESENTATION = GENDER this is me saying i personally feel that its generally a good idea to err on the side of "hey if this person seems to be presenting as something different than what i perceive as their sex, i am going assume they want to be read as that gender." basically if you act like its offensive to ever assume that someone might be trans, you are at best prioritizing cis feelings, and at worst being extremely facetious and saying you HAVE to misgender people for progressive gender nonconformity reasons when actually you just dont see them as the gender they say they are

[the-sun-is-evil]

im neither cis or trans, but a secret third thing

[cephalodon]

i dunno what everybody else is talking about your warabi is fabulous

thank you!!! 😭💜

[muirneach]

i would like to express three blanket statements for everyone in the notes:

- yes i obviously know that calling people ‘family’ is a way of referring the other queer people. this is evident in the fact that i used that fucking word in the post jesus christ guys you don’t need to try and inform me of this

- related, but this was a rhetorical post. i do not need advice on how to talk to people. i am involved with real life trans groups and am well versed in how to subtly talk to people. i literally made this post while on break from my bad customer service job after seeing multiple trans customers

- maybe this is a me problem but people having dysphoria from being seen as trans is sad to me. like i sorta get it but also hm maybe work on ur self hatred idk. being trans is a joy

reading comprehension questions:

consider the targeted demographic of this post. then consider, do you dislike this demographic? if so, please try changing your opinion or at least scroll away and stop bothering me about it

did the author make reference to old forms of queer communication? if so, it seems like he is familiar with the concept and perhaps refrain from informing the author about it

why might have the author, at first glance, described dysphoria as self hatred? did he really do this, or does he rather acknowledge that one facet of dysphoria stems from depression and deprecation? consider why someone might not want to be seen as trans. is it for safety reasons, or because they have yet to unlearn the perceived shame of being trans, or any other multitude of reasons? any reason is perfectly valid but one may wish to examine their opinions on the cis view of the trans body

seeing trans ppl in public is literally life giving. wish there was a normal way to express to other trans people in public that we’re family and that i love them

[fagofgod]

fuck you IMDA fuck you IMDA forever

[avenin]

being like actually vulnerable for a second; I feel like I can’t get over this like trans-medical thought process I have about my own body. the second voice in my head that tells me no matter how hard I work to transition I’ll never be an actual “real” man because I wasn’t born with the parts. it’s like a beast prowling around inside my mind. ripping and tearing at my thoughts until I don’t even know what I want anymore, so I abandon it altogether because how the hell am I supposed to fight a goddamn tiger in my head?

I feel so limited in my own thinking but it’s not as easy as just going “well it’s not true! and you need to just not think that way!” to make it stop. I probably need therapy or some shit about it but I have other things going on in my life. and tbh I sometimes wonder if it’s just my autism brain NEEDING boxes to understand how the world around me works: in combo with societal conditioning. But it’s just so limiting and I feel like I’ve been walking in circles for years now trying to figure out what being trans means to me and I’m getting nowhere. I’m kinda losing my mind about it honestly.

how do you just stop looking at the body and societies ideas of gender as binary code? ones and zeros. like I know nonbinary and gnc and non-traditional looking gender exists and is a thing and I love it and thinks it’s great! I know intersex bodies are real and exist and are beautiful and amazing and shouldn’t be changed! but in regards to myself; how to I stop looking at my body and going “this is not a man. this is never how a man would look no amount of work will ever change that.”